I was kindly reminded a couple of days ago that I hadn't posted anything to my blog in a very long time. This is true, and there are a couple of reasons why I haven't. First, where the heck do I find time to do this? Second, my children are doing and saying things now that may require an "adult content" filter! OMG, these preteen and teen years! They are gonna kill me.
Well the kids are with their dad for their two week summer vacation right now, so I currently DO have some time. This is typically when I tackle a bunch of home improvement projects that are on my "list." This list is quite long and expensive (yes, I'd LOVE to remodel the basement but don't think I can quite fit that into the two weeks or into my budget). We shall see what gets accomplished. Instead of painting right now, I am blogging, so it's not looking promising.....
Also, the two week home improvement project list is a way for me to cope with my children being gone for two entire weeks! At first it is nice. I went to the grocery store today and strolled through the aisles picking out exactly what I wanted to eat this week. I didn't hear Sloan's voice in one ear asking me to get pop tarts, ice pops, ice cream and potato chips, nor did I hear Emma's voice in the other ear asking me to get celery, granola bars, yogurt and whole grain bread. Yes, Mars and Venus. So true. I did hear a voice telling me the total amount I spent when I got to the cashier and I almost yelled for joy when I realized how much I had saved! That is what happens during the first few days the kids are gone.
Then the house gets quiet. The stinky locker room smell starts to subside in Sloan's room. I don't hear, "Mom, where is my other sock....or my phone....or the mayonnaise?" The dirty clothes stack is noticeably smaller. I don't have Coke cans to pick up. I don't put three plates on the table for dinner. Even the dog and three cats seem a little sad. It is that point -- a few days into the two weeks -- that I realize how much I MISS those little imps that aren't little anymore. What the heck am I going to do when they go to college? It is such a cliché, but time just goes by too fast.
I found a diary I started for Emma when she was two weeks old. It brought tears to my eyes to read those entries about nights of colic, the word "mine" which Emma learned quickly after Sloan was born, and my first day back to work after having children (and getting to go to the restroom ALL BY MYSELF). Of course the entries became fewer and farther between once Sloan was born and especially after their dad left and I became a single mom, but boy, I am so glad I decided to keep this journal. It is priceless now. I need to keep writing in it because life just continues on, but with a little less innocence unfortunately. An entry from the diary on 12/13/01 (Emma was just 2 months old) was as follows:
You had your 2 month appointment yesterday and what an appointment it was. Three dreadful shots to those precious little legs. Of course, they're vaccinations and are good for you but it's so hard for me to see you in pain! Oh, what am I going to do when you start taking a liking to little boys and experience your first heartbreak? So many life experiences to go through and I just want to protect you!
So now we are about at that stage of liking boys and experiencing heartbreak. I'm not sure how that compares to colic and vaccines, but I can tell you that I still feel the same as I did over 13 years ago. I still want to hold that 5'8" girl and protect her.......
No comments:
Post a Comment