It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's a SHARK???

Here is another Emma/Sloan "incident" that dates back to 2012, which is when I wrote this (somewhat revised):

 

Last week at work was pretty much devoted to preparation for our Deep Dive meeting which was scheduled from 9-2 on Friday.  Friday morning, I woke up the kids with a “good morning, hope you slept well, and I need your help getting ready and getting out of the house this morning” talk.  In other words, I cannot keep reminding you to brush your teeth, brush your hair, put your clothes on, make your beds, feed the cat, feed the birds, etc.  My goal was to get out of the house by 7:30.  It was a rushed morning because, no matter how much I lecture, Sloan is just easily distracted.  If he spots his Nerf gun while he is putting on his shoes, well the Nerf gun will take priority.  So we are finishing up with breakfast by around 7:15 and I give them the countdown – 15 minutes and we have to leave.  Brush teeth, get bookbags, get jackets.  I go back to my bedroom to brush my teeth and finish getting ready and after about 5 or so minutes, I hear them calling, "We need your help.”  I yell from the back of the house, “GET READY TO GO.”  After a few seconds, I hear again, “We NEED your help.”  This time, I can tell something is wrong.  So both JA2 (who had become my husband by then -- refer to a prior post for definition of "JA2") and I run to the front of the house where the screaming is coming from.  The kids are both outside in the driveway and Emma is holding her remote for her AirSwimmer.  In case you don’t know what an AirSwimmer is, it is a 4-5’ long helium filled shark.  She is frantically jerking on the controls and looking upward to a very small fish in the sky.  I completely LOSE it.  Not only were they told to do everything they can to help us get out on time but they had both been told that they could not bring this shark outside unless a parent was present.  Emma had gotten the present from Santa Claus and had only played with it one or two days inside.  (Which meant I couldn’t say, “EMMA, I PAID $70 FOR THAT THING.”)  The neighbors probably are going to report me to DSS because I was yelling at the top of my voice from the porch for them to GET INSIDE NOW.  And I probably made several threats. 

 

So by that time, I am ranting and raving about how disobedient they had been and TODAY, of all days, why did they decide to do this?  Emma is in the bathroom crying and then doesn’t want to come out because her eyes are swollen up and she doesn’t want to go to school that day.  Sloan just keeps saying, “I am so sorry, mommy.”  And JA2 is out riding the streets with the AirSwimmer remote trying to get within range of the doggone shark.  He asked several people in the neighborhood if they saw the swimming shark and at least one of them asked if he had been drinking that morning.    He said he saw it in a nose dive so it has to be in someone’s backyard and I can just imagine the look on their face……

 

So I am at a loss on whether to try to find the thing because I did spend money on it or just let it go because Emma does not deserve a flying shark.  I am also debating whether to put up a sign in the neighborhood – you know under the Missing Cat sign – advertising we have a Missing Flying Shark.  Just wondering how many prank calls I will get.

 

So if you see a shark flying by or hear of someone who has found one in their backyard, please let me know.  Until then, both kids are on restrictions……..